How not to get her attention


Look fellas I understand that Sexting was pretty popular when sending photos via text became revolutionary but let’s just leave it in the past and with the hormonal Tweens. This will NOT receive a response. This photo speaks: let’s fuck!! And I’m a women, sex is way to easy to come by, so another sleazy creep trying to get in our pants defiantly isn’t the route to get in them. Slow down. . . Can I at least get a hello before I see your pelvic bone?

Silly silly men.


Quotes of the day March 25th

Loving your life is necessary. Sometimes it’s hard but once you recognize your unhappiness, lock it away from you head and heart, you’ll find your happiness. Especially when you just realized you haven’t been loving you, like you should. It jolts you into reality and you make an inventory of people and things around you. All of a sudden you are wiser, stronger, enthusiastic and genuinely happier. Some may counter you, but it’s because they are still stuck in a somber limbo, it’s hard to believe in positivity of others when you are unhappy. It’s too foreign to comprehend. I speak fluent enthusiasm for my future days!!!








Good Hygiene, What’s so damn difficult?



This evening, I took an breath-taking shower after the gym.  I laid in bed with only a towel and absorbed the good smells that were emitting out of my pores and I was in such solace. This started a topic in my mind: Why do some people not value hygiene as much as I do?

Now I know there are some folks who can not control their chronic body odor problems. Such as individuals with Bromhidrosis, also known as bromidrosis or body odor, is a common phenomenon in postpubertal individuals. In rare cases, bromhidrosis may become pathologic if it is particularly overpowering or if the bromhidrosis significantly interferes with the lives of the affected individuals. Bromhidrosis is a chronic condition in which excessive odor, usually an unpleasant one, emanates from the skin. Bromhidrosis, determined largely by apocrine gland secretion, can substantially impair a person’s quality of life.

I will eliminate these folks. That is no laughing matter and must be beyond frustrating. But, I’m talking about those folks who just choose to wake up and leave the house without showering and thinks it’s fair that you affect my nostrils sanity with your foul ass pits. It’s selfish!!!

  • If you don’t brush your teeth the moment you wake up and you check the clock and it’s 1pm—> brush your damn teeth

  • If you can physically see plaque in your teeth—-> brush your damn teeth
  • If you can smell your private parts through clothing —-> wash your ass 

  • If I can see debris in your ears from a foot away—> I don’t even understand how you can hear, but I know you can read this—> buy an earwax removal kit, then just start over with cu-tips. 

Ear Wax Removal Kit KIT by Nasaline 1 of 2<——- $27.00 and I know you have the money because you sure don’t have a high water bill.

  • If you haven’t showered in 24 hours—> wash your ass, I don’t care if you haven’t done anything but lay in bed, you still sweat. 

Keep Good Hygiene Step 3.jpg

  • If you are dating and sexually active —> please be fair and wash your parts, no one wants to taste the gym floor between your legs. As AW says, if it smells like earring back I’m not putting my tongue in that.

  • Grown men, basketball shorts are not underwear and especially ones that you know you haven’t washed in a week.—> first your too grown to have drawstrings under your jeans. 

It isn’t that hard to wash, realize that if you smell yourself then others do too. Just be fair. . .



You want to F*** me and be an A**hole, how does that work?

Hi Hater

Hi Hater (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Good day Guise and Eves,

I must say its a pretty decent day, the weather feels good in Houston, sounds like an oxymoron; Houston, Texas and Good weather how can this be in July. * according to Bloomberg;” ITS GLOBAL WARMING, STUPID!” *


Now EVES have you every dated a man or men dated a women, and My lovely gays have you ever had a partner, for any length of time, and noticed that he likes to criticize you often. Similar to a girl in grade school who was jealous of you. Not jealous of you cheating and other men, but of YOU, . I like examples I believe they make everything more transparent:

EX #1

He knows you come from a supportive family, but he tries to undermine the help that your family gives;from emotional to financial help; using words such as grow up, when are you going to stop relying on them. .  . —> is this due to the fact that you don’t have a safety net? Who doesn’t like a safety net in life, if they were lucky enough to have one?

You discuss with him you workout regiment, instead of being supportive  or simply quiet, he criticizes you like he is a body builder as if he was  competing in Arnold Sports Festival ( Yes Arnold Schwarzenegger),  and tells you everything you’re doing is wrong, even though he  never saw you while working out. —-> Are you mad because you don’t have six-pack and I’m cute already so the more fit I am the more attention I gain?


He always, okay always is too strong, I like often. He often speaks to her in a patronizing factious manner, as if she is unintelligent, although you know that she is quite intelligent in many facets in life;  from daily life, crisis mode to “book-smart”. —->  is the because you know that she is clever but prefer for her not to feel clever, maybe you like her to rely on you, maybe you like her to feel subservient to you or subordinate. What caste do you belong to in this western culture? Oh yeah caste systems do not exist here. . . hmmmm


Maybe he likes to tease you often, make fun of your insecurities, even call out things that you didn’t notice were abnormal. Make you feel not as attractive, but you know you are.  Anything from the way you speak, walk, stand, eat, sleep  dress. . . ANYTHING —> maybe he’s an ugly duck and knows he can’t do better than you

EX #4

Money, oh I hate this one, trying to control your money in the sense of telling what and when to buy, when you don’t live together, share accounts or have any financial bonds. —> is he broke? SIMPLY!!

Here are some signs of a Jealous man ( When i Say Jealous, I mean Jealous of you—> HATING

  • Tell you how to dress (because you dress well, he wants to make you more simple to match his hobo garb)
  • Be overly concerned about where you are going when socializing ( he just wants to be apart of the in crowd, too bad he doesn’t know how to dress)

  • Put you down and will do anything to make you feel inferior
  • Have a negative outlook and poor self-esteem/lack of confidence (obviously)
Maybe some of you have been lucky enough to avoid relationships with people of this nature, but unfortunately my girlfriends and I have not. It’s actually all quite comical.
P.S if i come off overly confident and into myself, it is because I AM. . .

Donation Scams for Sandy Hook Victims

It deeply disturbs me that I must write this post; in every possible way, from the victims who died to the selfish greedy asinine imbeciles who create fake websites and PayPal accounts to STEAL money from the Sandy Hook victims families. A women from Bronx, New York, named NOUEL (NOEL) ALBA used her G-mail account to create a fake account in Noah Ponzer’s name (6-year-old victim), and was routing the payments that were made through PayPal to her personal checking account, gaining $300. At this point, these are speculations. CNN did go to her house and she did agree that it was her G-mail account and her “crafting-enemy’s” created this account to attack her, and after CNN visited her house, she returned the money. Now we can wait to see if the FBI confirms her as the true culprit but we all know her excuse is ridiculous. So as individual’s who are eager to donate funds to the victims families there are some tips that we must pay attention to. The following tips are from the Federal Trade Commission and the National Center For Disaster Preparedness:

  • Do not respond or open attachments from unsolicited emails claiming to be from charitable organizations.

  • Donate directly through the organization’s website. Do not follow links from emails to donation sites or allow an individual or third-party organization to make the donation on your behalf.

  • Do not send cash, money order, or wire transfers.

  • Contact the charity directly to authenticate the fundraiser (use a local or nationally recognized phone number, not the phone number listed in the email).

  • Validate the charity through sites like or the Better Business Bureau, especially if the soliciting organization has a name similar to that of a well-recognized organization.

  • Never divulge personal information such as your social security number.

  • Take notice of the organization’s web address. Most legitimate non-profit organizations end in .org, not .com.

  • Be wary of solicitations from those claiming to be surviving victims of a well-publicized disaster.

Some Legitimate Sites:

If you are unable to donate financially, there are other ways you can contribute, just visit

Man on the verge of cheating (MOVC), what are the signs? I don’t know!

What inspired this topic. . .  Well, I was talking to a very close family member M.L.C (she will not allow me disclose her identity so I jumbled her initials). She told a story of a bizarre situation. . .  And now I will share her story with you. . .

M.L.C and a friend go out for a friday night drink, to a bar that they regularly frequent, she meet a cute guy , the chatted, he leaves,  she leaves. She goes to another bar, he texts her asking where she was, she tells him, he arrives. They flirt, chat, giggle over ridiculous banter, then he abruptly leaves.  He text her saying he had a great time but had to work early in the morning.

M.L.C couldn’t seem to find comfort with his answer, so the next day, boldly and securely she messaged him asking what happen, he honestly responded with a sorry-filled message telling her that he is married, a bad guy, did not want to lead her on and that his wife was out of town. She deletes his message and number. END OF STORY.


It is a good thing that this man ended things before it even started and saved her from stress and possible heart-break but I call this a MAN-ON-THE-VERGE-OF-CHEATING (MOVC)

I assume this title can say “Woman-on-the-verge-of- cheating” (WOVC)

Google is my source for all answers, so here is what I found.

 A MOVC: “long story short, bored at work and with my marriage, make a okcupid profile, hot chick messages me, we text. . . i was going to meet her at a restaurant, but at the last-minute i decided against it. too risky i live in  small town, so going out in public would be dangerous i told her we should meet at a place an hour away so i wont recognize anyone. . .  basically i just want to bang and that’s it. i keep leading her on. . . im thinking i should just tell her the deal, that im married and if she is down, then lets do it”

 I would consider this man beyond the verge and just about a full-blown cheater, his opportunity just hasn’t arrived, he doesn’t care about the layers of deception that comes with this life style, it simply seems as if his only worry is being caught.

I found this article on the FLY GUY CHRONICLES,  they discuss the six signs of a WOVC:

1. She’s Turning 25 or 30 or 35 or . . .

Decade and half-decade birthdays trigger navel-gazing-figuratively, and perhaps literally. A woman asks herself, “What have I been doing for the past 5 years?”

2. She’s Been Promoted

Women like to have projects and goals. When she reaches a milestone-say, in her career—she may start to think, Now what? says Bonnie Eaker Weil, Ph.D.

3. She’s Moving in with You

Yes, it was probably her idea. But now that you’re together 24-7 and sharing every detail of your lives, there’s not as great a need to keep the conversation flowing every minute.

4. She Thinks You’ve Cheated

Revenge affairs are common. Women have them in an attempt to restore self-esteem and feel desirable again.

5. She’s Not Getting Enough

Oxytocin, a hormone that plays a central role in our urge to bond, spikes to levels three to five times higher than usual just before orgasm. The hormone is more intense in females than in males, so women develop a stronger sense of bonding through sex.

6. She’s Ready to Bolt

She wants to dump you. Infidelity can break up couples, so she might cheat on purpose as an easy out

Signs of a MOVC according to the “EXPERTS” of Your Tango:

1. Hesitation. The fact that you’re hesitating about an obvious relationship that you’re in reveals that you’re uncertain about your current relationship and where you two stand.

2. Gawking. Staring or making eyes with someone who isn’t your partner

3. Sharing too much. Sharing too much information with the person you’re attracted

4. Side dating. Agreeing to meet anyone for a “quick lunch,” “a drink,”

5. The brush. Playful as it may seem, brushing against one another can excite both of you as your bodies begin to manifest latent desires

6. Touching. Touching one another sends certain signals to your brain.

 7. Lying. If you ever feel the need to start lying about what you and your friend are doing when you meet

8. Change in mood. If you’re suddenly happy, grumpy, absent-minded all the time or displaying any other noticeable change in behavior,

9. Change in appearance. If you begin to splurge on areas you didn’t before, such as a new haircut, lingerie, a gym membership

10. Drastic lifestyle changes.

Theses sign may be helpful, but I believe regardless if you are a man or a women, in your soul, you feel a sense of disconnect with your partner.  Many couples, I believe, ignore this inner tug and then find themselves “surprised” when they have been deceived.

let me know what you think. . .



New Guise and EVES and the AGE OF AQUARIUS

I haven’t written on my blog in a while, I assume that I either lost interest or didn’t find it a priority. But, I turned a new leaf (AGAIN), I am the type of person who turns leafs and has epiphany’s every few days. I’ll blame that on my Caribbean heritage and genetics from the Mendes‘ and Paterson‘s, if you know them then you’ll get it. The blogs that I will be writing , will be similar to what I have written in the past, which is about men and women, but my perspective has change.  As I have evolved and aged, it is interesting to see how I have experienced and interpreted life.  Hey that’s maturity for your ass. (OH yeah that’s one thing that hasn’t changed I still cuss like a drunken sailor). So here’s to the new GUISEEVES. . . It is appropriate as the Age of Aquarius begins this month, actually 12-21-12, The DAY WE ALL SHALL DIEEEEEE!!!! OR as “Astrologers see the Age of Aquarius as being the age of computers, freedom, electricity, rebels, astrology, and humanitarianism, among others ideas. Some hope the age will bring in a time of philanthropy and peace, while others expect a time of unrest, nonconformity, and even rebellion. Some think man will leave earth and become decentralized as we spread across the galaxy. Many do not agree on what the Age of Aquarius 2012 beginning will bring to mankind, but all agree some kind of change is coming”


Eves Desperation for “any type” of L.O.V.E


   /lʌv/ Show Spelled [luhv] Show IPA noun, verb, loved, lov·ing.
a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
sexual passion or desire.
a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
(used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?
verb (used without object)
Love is such an important component for survival in this hectic life we live.  When we don’t have love, then as humans we seek love, and often we become desperate for it. There is nothing wrong with the desire for love, we need love, it feels amazing to be loved, to love and to be in love. But, the problem occurs when desire turns to desperation. . . When we become desperate to possess love, we go about it in all the wrong ways. We try to make love into something it’s not and call things Love’s name when love has nothing to do with it. For instance, a man who physically abuses his girlfriend may say he loves her, but what kind of love is that. It is only a woman desperate for love who is willing to accept that type of treatment; confusing love with something it’s not.
I will discuss EVES today because I experienced an EVE earlier this week and it completely threw me for a loop.
I was on the airport, from a full day of travel, and i was beyond tired, lost luggage cancelled and delayed flights, dear heavens. Any who, I was walking and I overheard this women saying “I slept on the airport last night”, in my head I was like, “SHIT, if my day sucked then hers must of been beyond shitty”,  Some how this women and I start talking, she tells me her story. . .
She is a roughly 40 years old woman, from Ohio I believe, she met a man online on August 1, 2012, they chatted and I suppose she really started liking him, so he told her to fly down to Houston, TX and he would pick her up, on August 31, 2012, a month after meeting online. So shes pays $400+ for a one way ticket to Houston, he was suppose to drive from Dallas, TX to Houston, TX (a 4 and a half hour drive), the problem is he never came and rejected her phone calls when she called him. This women came to Houston with minimal money, not enough for a hotel, no family or friends in Houston, just stuck on the airport.
So in my mind, what would posses a woman to do such a stupid thing. . .  DESPERATION FOR LOVE.
Love wants to uphold you, cherish you, caress you, protect you; love is not violent, vicious, or crude. People, when will we wake up to the truth, it is not that love is not all around us, it is our stubborn refusal to receive love, our desperate longing, and misdirection that keeps us opening the wrong door.

If you feel desperate for love then just stop for a minute. You are most likely headed in the opposite direction of love. STOP! trying to do too much. There is no one you need to impress or please. Love accepts you completely for who you are. So be free! Love is waiting for you to just ask for what you truly desire.